I’m considering a move—possibly to [another town], but who knows, I got no pianos tied to my ass. But for once, I could do something without fear of losing what precious little I’ve got. But that situation is reserved for the Harry’s of the world. [Something here scribbled out.]
And I can’t kick the feeling of, entrapment I’d say, with the night club idea. Didn’t Kershbaumer lose his shirt on that one? Plus it gives [the government] a chance to keep more files on you. And my gathering experience tells me that’s how this country makes you loyal—by not giving you the option of doing otherwise.
[Author’s note 2015-12-11: I recall this entry like it was last week. Morrison got this brilliant idea to apply for a “small business loan” that was being offered by the government in those days. But our old drummer, Kershbaumer, had opened some other business with such funds and they nailed him good after it failed. For life. The story is they suckered him into borrowing every more after it was apparent that was not the answer.
As for losing "what precious little I've got", that amounted to a car and a few household articles, all of which I had finally paid off the loans. Before that, yes, they could have taken back everything I had. I had left home with only the clothes on my back.
I was also just out of university and growing extremely cautious about the degree to which the government was beginning to document everything and everybody. Ah, you thought I just cooked up some theory ten years ago. No, I grew up in a world where nothing was kept on file except your birth and death certificates, and how much taxes you paid. It was a freer system. Better than now.
Morrison kept getting deeper into the quagmire of government regulation and I opted out, for which he never forgave me. Hey, I never agreed that he could start signing away my soul for a government loan. I’d already had a student loan to pay and did not trust the government worth a lick.
But the reference to Harry is curious. He was the rich kid who could risk everything because his family would bail him out. This is the same Harry as the “Living like Harry” stock witticism of 2009 or so. Whereby once a person, in this case Jackie, got on a government dole, he could spend his last dollar on the last day of the month, because he knew for certain the welfare check would be there in the morning. Hence, “Living like Harry.” It’s mean, but that’s where it comes from.]
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