Who remembers (Eddie) that distant relation of Bill Monroe whom I met at Jimbos? He finally did a return visit, right on Karaoke night. I wound up singing tunes I never registered for, although the same could be said about most things I do. He wants me to compose some original bass lines and I was going to decline until he played several of his own tunes (by his band called “Left Over Salmon”) on the juke box. That instantly separates him from the wankers in this town. Have a listen yourself, “Highway Song” and “Nobody’s Fault But Mine”.Then he told me about an episode I was unaware of. He walked in one day when another band was playing and asked if he could jam. Turns out he had been expecting me to be there, having told his people he’d finally met “a serious bass player”. He got on stage and did so well, “The singer got pissed off and grabbed his guitar back and walked out the door.” He can’t remember the band’s name, but I’ll give you three guesses. One guess per word. (Later, it was the Hippie. The Hippie does not like serious bass players who steal his thunder on stage.
Author's note 2015-06-07: the following was written in the enthusiasm of the moment. This was 2009 and I was just beginning to discover all the guitarists I knew had an inability to learn new music. Up until then, I had always just gone along with whatever the guitarist could play. It's when I needed a guitarist to actually learn my music that the trouble started.
This could be easy, as his music would remind you of Jimmy Buffet. A little bit country with a completely different band each time. That suits my split and/or multiple personalities just fine. A lot of 9ths and major 7ths yet keeping to the circle of 5ths. He knows the entertainer at the Lamp Post, where I admit to only visiting once and that was five years ago (didn’t like it). The regular musician there owns a recording studio.
Eddie also knows Arnel, and was in the audience one day when some people commented that everything was recorded and Arnel wasn’t really playing anything. So Eddie went up and asked for “a well known instrumental”. Arnel did a five minute lead break that showed everyone who was boss. That was at Boston Johnny’s. Remind me to tell Arnel about that. I see most other musicians share my opinion of Boston’s.
Turns out besides music, Eddie and I are fans of limericks. Here’s the one that cracked us up last night:
In days of old when knights were bold,
Commodes were not invented.
They dropped their load
Beside the road,
And walked away contented.
It means nothing at this point, since my technical Spanish is too rusty for intense instructions, but Alfredo said today I was one of the best apprentices he’s seen. The tale is emerging of how he has tried for a long time to find any decent help. I know some of the people he asked. I don’t think I told Alfredo I had some minor experience with a stitching machine because that is something I prefer he do himself. The point being that he also said he had not taken a vacation in years and mentioned letting me run the shop for a few weeks. Do we detect a pattern here?
The shoe shop gets a lot of telemarket calls. Part of the reason is that many people don’t know about the no-call list and Alfredo’s number has been targeted. There is a fine point here, where I tell the callers the number is on the no-call list. Occasionally some smart ass will argue out that you “cannot put a business number on the no-call list”. Nonsense, you can put any number on the list, but they are permitted to call business numbers. I didn’t say they couldn’t call, but I am saying they totally miss the point, which is probably why they are telemarketers to begin with. I hear the reason they don’t outlaw telemarketing is because some people would lose their jobs. Well that just breaks all of our little hearts into itty bitty pieces.
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