Agent M has an iMac. It is over nine years old and runs circles around my 2.34 gigahertz IBM/windows piece of junk. I’ve had one major computer crash every year since 1992 when I bought my first non-Apple equipment. I won’t mention the minor problems. But I did correctly predict IBM-based PCs would be nothing but trouble when I first saw the complicated operating system they used back in 1984. For those who don’t know the tale, IBM started using DOS, a really bad system pirated by Bill Gates. DOS cannot be improved, it can only be updated by adding more and more code, which slows down the computer, so they have to build a faster chip and the you know the vicious circle. IBM did try to kick Gates out by developing their own operating system. I think it was called OS/2. It flopped because some genius designed it to only work well with IBM software. Apple did the same, but IBM software isn’t Apple software no matter how hard they try to copy it.
Today, I learn how to make onion rings. I’ve failed too often so I’m on a search for the recipe that works. I even tried store-bought batter and all it did was turn my cooking oil dark, although my freedom fries now have a nice golden tone. If like myself, you have noticed the serving size of onion rings drop to half over the past few years, get back here for my review of what I find on-line.
Later. It turns out onion rings are quite the industry in America. Where do I get free samples? I’ve learned they use only sweet onions, and that they dust their rings with flour before dipping into the batter, saying it makes the batter stick better. I was definitely having trouble with that. So far, the best recipe for batter is tempura (egg and flour) but like all Japanese food, it looks better than it tastes. I’m on the right track.
Even later. The second live gig did not go so well, I’ve allowed for the fact that it never does. The scary thing is that the errors were mostly identical to the ones made three weeks ago. No change, no improvement. Remember, these songs are all material the singer told me she already knew. The tune is called “The Rose”, not “A Rose”, you see what I’m getting at. Also, I’m detecting far too much stage fright for someone who is supposed to have many years of experience. There are overall too many signs that I am the only one doing the work, precisely the situation that causes me to team up with others.
Then to top it off, Eddie and I got to talking women. Somebody bought the house a round just as I finished packing the gear, so we sat up at the bar. A woman nearby was listening in and kept pointing out every few sentences that the fault must be with us, not the women. We were looking in the wrong places, we were too fussy, we didn’t have anything to offer, you know the drill. She kept adding a little home-spun wisdom to everything we said, like we’d overlooked the really important things in life and everything we knew could stand a little improvement. Finally I asked her if she was a Canadian. She was.
