I was minding the shop and practicing writing short how-to’s for FireHow. It may seem like that is a big deal for a few days, but the reality is that this blog has a set of priorities. It does not seem like it because the priorities revolve so that things read more like real life. By now, I’ve read some 300 other articles in almost every category. FireHow desperately needs a filing system. Right now, it is a blog, with each existing article shunted down the list by each new addition.Thus, your chances of being read are around the same as in Craigslist, or next to zero unless you are in the top ten. I pondered a little over whether all the tricks that work on Craigslist would do the same, but I didn’t go there. The more prolific writers on FireHow have been members for at least ten months. The winning formula seems to be a new post every second day for a long stretch, then take it easy.
I have not yet found my bearings, but my income has been going up 20 cents per day. Gee, if I keep that up for five years, that’s $364.80. Per day. Of course it is much too early to predict a trend. For the most part, the other writers are a dreary lot. It is the future value of such accumulations that should be the focus here. Oddly, I began writing at the age of 15, but could not pursue it.
Writing (or any productive activity with a long-term payoff) would have had to be kept a total secret from my family. That would have been impossible, you don’t know those people. They would have cut off all support because you were wasting time. One could not have “lived” on the equivalent of 20 cents a day while building the business without their malicious interference. I was the only one of six that even learned to type. Yet it is clear a comfortable rich kid with no aptitude could easily have done it just for the spending money. See, I just explained Danielle Steele and Dean Koontz both.
Author's note: the above is not clear. I'm explaining to the world why I did not start writing a book at an earlier age. Writing is not exactly the best career choice for those who have to put in a 40-hour week just to pay the bills. I was thinking at the time how Rowlins, the Harry Potter lady, didn't produce a thing until she got on welfare--all the proof I need that society stifles the working poor by being over-generous to the plain lazy.
Later, I have something most strange to report. I got home mid-afternoon and required a nap. An hour later, I heard the cat (or cats) knock something over, which I ignored (for my upper left chest is still in pain). Two hours later, I awakened to find water spilled all over my computer desk and keyboard. The laws of physics state that liquid must have been in a container, yet I found no evidence of any such source.
Bingo turned out excellent, not for the amount of money in the jar, but because the entire game went so well. The audience is trained, and the now regular tables of newcomers are plainly impressed by the show. The second foot-pedal is a boon, it makes my show seamless. And that is how I get tips—-a top-notch show. While the weekend show before rent day (next Thursday) is rarely lucrative, today was proof that at least I’m on the right track.
As I walked in to set up my Bingo gear, I heard a massive roar from the crowd, saying I was on TV. I looked up and be damned, it was me to a tee. Some author plugging his new book which had a name like “Roots”. This was no mere resemblance, it was like seeing myself in a mirror. So you’ll know, you can write a book called “Roots” any time you like. You can copyright the book, but the law does not permit you to copyright the title. See, I’m learning. I’ll be changing the name of this blog to “Harry Potter”. Just kidding.
Last, let me clear up another popular misconception. The Coca-Cola formula. It is not patented, nor is it a secret. Why? Because the company would have to list the formula to protect it, and besides, the patent protection would long since have expired. The fact is, modern spectral analysis can easily determine the exact ingredients, which include nutmeg, lemon juice and caramel.
Author's note 2015-03-27: the source of the water was a puddle out on the street. Some drivers hit the speed bump hard enough to splash right up over my open transom, where Pudding-Tat was resting on the warm computer case.
