[Author’s note: the date is approximate, this is transcribed from a notebook I found [recently] from a trip to Venezuela. When I’m traveling, all young women are aged 18. Also, keep in mind this was over 35 years ago, so bear with the attempts at humor. Yes, I carry a credit card when I leave North America. You cannot survive out there without one.
As for my inclination to make fools of idiots, it’s the kind of guy I am.. But only in retaliation, and mainly to people who get in my way. Accept they are already fools, I'm just helping them realize it.]
kLate Sunday, I met Dagmar. A local beauty—and she speaks excellent English. It’s even better, because at 18, she’s nows nothing of the world. Ergo, she can be relied on to translate exactly what I want.
I saw a Russian style queue and got in line. I got in line. About two hours late, I discover I am on a tour through the human body. It’s plastic, about 300 feet long and 30 feet high. It’s a (reclining) woman in blue jeans, and Dagmar ensures (sic) me the part I’m entering is the mouth.
She studies “from 7 till 2”, and must ask her mother’s permission to meet me at the band at 3:00 tomorrow. You watch, her mother will be a birch supreme--like I’m going to offer Dagmar Bs10,000 to strip for me, or something. Nonsense I say. 5,000 is plenty.
n case you missed the part of translating exactly, I’ll elaborate. This “macho” thing is still prevalent. Nothing seems to stop them from giving you the answer they want instead of what you want. Hence, the bank and Dagmar.
My credit card is at the limit, and I want to transfer $800 from my checking to the Visa. The banks all have somebody who speaks English, but to no avail. If he (usually) was in Venezuela on holidays, he would take out $800 and he would spend it and he would come back for more. Notice how what I want never enters his answer. The convo stops at this point because he’s stuck with his idea and cannot be dislodged. You cannot explain your do not want $800 to carry around, and he can’t understand why you want to transfer $800 and spend it in smaller amounts.
Of course, I walk away the worse because I never asked him what he wanted. What he doesn’t understand is that tomorrow I show up with Dagmar and make a fool of him if he does not perform.
