I bumped into Mike the Spike last evening, and he says the turnaround time on their ATM is only a couple of days. However, you have to submit the report manually. There is also some nonsense about having to be sponsored by a bank, but that is why we have offshore incorporation. If the corporation is really a separate legal entity why, in this country, does someone have to own it? (In a larger sense isn't one entity owning another entity also called slavery?)
[Authors note: here's an early stab at what eventually became known as SEO, Search Engine Optimization. I was also surprised to find out how many people believed that they had to give out personal information when it was asked for in the Internet. Less than a year from today I was making extra money on the side teaching people how to get around that.]
So, I followed up on the ATM purchase. Sure enough, in true Internet style, the worst losers seem to have their site at the top no matter what search criteria you use as a filter. So I played a little game with the first one on the list, some outfit called “atmexchange”. Did I ever get some dropout named Scott Boone all discombobulated. I got him bent right out of shape when I got his prices and published them on the Internet. (I did it because he used my inquiry to pump me for information and then quoted me a retail price for some wholesale machines.) Salesman usually tend to think you're as dumb as they are.
My real objection is that when you are price hunting, it is a waste of time to have to scroll through sites that won’t state the price. I don’t like wasting with people or websites that won't quote a price. I’m working the other side of the street. If what you are selling needs a salesman, maybe your product isn’t so hot to begin with.
In fact, I’m sort of working on a list of the ten worst business practices for the 21st century. Here is a good place to give the outline, because this Scott bozo was so ossified that he could not imagine a world without a salesman molesting the customer, the old “tell us a little about yourself, Bob.” You know, the old 1960s bull. Anyway, here’s my first draft of the list of DUMB and OUTDATED practices:
1. Not stating your price up front. It's insulting to have to ask for prices when we have the Internet. Menu in the window, pal.
2. Selling the customer his own warrantee and calling it a "Service Contract", the whole concept is disgusting. It won't last, the seller (not the manufacturer) should replace it for free.
3. California pricing. Does anyone out there really think you're going to get eye surgery for $299 or that you could rent a car for $19.95 a day?
4. “Required” fields on a website. Politely asking is an altogether different matter.
5. Using rebate cards to pump customers for private information. That whole concept is sick. A rebate is a promise that has nothing to do with your birth date.
6. Not giving cash discounts. Cash doesn't bounce. Cash customers should get a discount.
7. Advertising anything as “free”. It should be outlawed. Lie to your mother but don't lie to me.
8. Insulting people who won't borrow money by insinuating their “credit isn't good enough”.
9. Tip gouging. Ever notice how many dropouts you have to deal with before somebody actually gets you a cup of coffee?
10. 800 complaint lines. If you're the type of business that produces something that causes complaints, you should at least have the decency to listen to them in person.
I did a thorough study on tea. At least 40 pages all told. Ask me anything about tea. English high tea and low tea depend on the height of the serving table. Orange Pekoe is named after a Dutch company, not the color of the tea. The climax of a Japanese tea ceremony is a several hour discussion of the utensils used to brew it. Now, does that sound like fun or what?
