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Yesteryear

Thursday, October 8, 2009

October 8, 2009

           What’s this then? Finally, a fashion out of Japan that makes sense, skirts with the internal view printed on the external material. That Kamikaze Geisha design mode they used for the past fifty years even looked like it survived a nuclear war. They finally had to admit that sex, in the Western sense of the word, actually exists and this is what you get. You may not be aware that there are vending machines in Japan that dispense used panties, so enjoy the view before this fad hits America and these dresses go size Oprah.
           If the shoe fits, wear it. If it doesn’t, bring it in and we have a massive selection of footware torturing devices patented 1895. There isn’t anything we can’t do to your shoes and again this week, a surprising number of chunks of street rubber are incorporated into our work. Street rubber is that incredibly durable material that keeps falling off vehicles. When we find a strip, it finds its way into inventory quickly enough.

           Today’s log/journal/blog, whatever, is coming to you via a fully reconfigured computer with a few added features, which I’ll get to. Remember, for street level introductions and explanations of new technology for those of us who never grew up with a computer in our bedrooms, you can’t beat this publication. Or so I’m told. Be sure to add a comment if you feel I’m using too much jargon—keeping in mind a certain amount is necessary. We can all agree that lofty sounding invitation is a safe bet since I’m the final judge of what constitutes “a certain amount”. I learned that kind of shit working for the phone company.
           During the process of building these computers to a 1999 standard, all the drivers necessary for a trial phase of the digital security camera system are in place. The reason for the old standard is that is the last year that “copy anything” software was unaffected by contemporary digital copyright protection. Of course, I copy for educational purposes only and today I have a batch of Ananiashvili CDs to run off. What? Oh, she’s a famous ballet dancer. I told you I meant educational. Was it Ronald Reagan that asked about ballet, “Why don’t they just hire taller dancers?”

           The video camera system works great. None of what I investigated is new technology, what is new is the plan I have for selling the stuff. Most of the established security stores have one foot in the CCTV era (closed circuit TV) and I notice they are still charging commensurately. I know I can undercut them and unlike almost every other money plan I’ve had at the shop, this one has raised no objections. I already have one sale and three more on hold. I have not promoted the gear, only explained to a few people that I’m looking into it.
           And I’m looking into a screen that can monitor up to 32 cameras. Sure, that’s nothing new, but I don’t even want to imagine the setup and operational costs of such a system using CCTV. The only wiring is between the camera and the nearest computer with an Ethernet connection. The rest is Internet, and I’m watching live a Laundromat, parking lot, store counter, and a hallway. These remote locations are as much as 52 miles from here. The log-on time is practically instant.
           These are real cameras installed by the team I’ve mentioned recently. I call them “The Camera Guys”. All that is needed is an IP address and password to connect to any compatible camera. Soon Wallace will be able to log on and view this yard from his laptop. So he can see how fantastically the forest branches have grown and how they hit the roof at night and wake up me and the cat, hint, hint.
           Again, I realize none of this is new, but what is new is how the serious drop in prices has opened up entirely new markets for a person with a little imagination. Didn’t I recently complain about those hovering helicopters and aren’t they restricted on how close they can fly to a scene and don’t they cost $600 per hour? For the right money, I’ll fly my RPV right into the blaze. Imagination.

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