Examine this bicycler’s paradise. Smooth, uncracked concrete twelve feet wide with no pedestrians. No tree roots jutting up, no crumbling shoulders, the only things I’d add are enough trees to make it a shady tunnel. It’s all for show just east of Presidential Circle. The remainder of Hollywood is so bad I’d once considered doing a documentary on it.
No sign of Dave-O, so he’s working that job. That kills our plans for a jaunt out of town until I dunno. The replacement computer for the replacement for the super computer is acting up itself. Why didn’t I stick with Apple? Instead, I’ve got a half day of copying all files and replacing hard drives. At least it keeps me out of the direct sunlight. You know, like the way some people should keep out of direct moonlight. Music is the dominant theme for now, another lengthy practice this afternoon brings us up to 20 tunes. It’s a mixed accomplishment, however, because it is the type of band I said I’d least prefer—but of course I meant any band is better than no band back when I said it. I’d hate to miss the sixth consecutive tourist season in a row and that is just around the September corner. I hear the questions already, so give me a little room and I’ll explain.
JJ, accomplished musician that he is, does not really copy any cover tunes, that is to say, he makes little concession to playing them authentically like the originals. In many cases, I suspect he has never heard the originals. This type of music can be easily accomplished by anyone who buys a fake book, if you’ve ever seen those. They list hundreds of songs and show only a basic melody line and the guitar chords. They do not show the countless little things that make that song unique.
Hence, especially when coupled with the auto-chord rhythms built into a keyboard, every tune pretty much sounds alike. Anybody who patronized the Seattle lounges in the 1980s will know what that sounds like. Still, any working band in Florida is better than nothing and I have no reason to complain as long as things move ahead. They are moving, for we have already the 20 plus songs needed for a short set.
Like many non-bassists, JJ has never listened to a tune specifically to hear out the bass line start to finish. This is not unusual, and many such musicians think of the bass as a root and fifth instrument, that familiar country “stomp” sound you often pick out when listening to bluegrass. But that is essentially grade one in bass, and it is not used anywhere near as often as some think. Probably because it gets boring fast.
Where I spend the past few days learning custom bass lines, it turns out I often can’t use them. That may sound odd so let me elaborate. Just like a Bb sax or an Eb trumpet, the bass has a natural key [of E] in which it is the easiest and sometimes only key to play certain hit tunes. But the most difficult keys are sharps and flats, in particular Eb and F, both popular piano keys. Guess what JJ plays a lot? This is not wrong, but I can say I’ve never heard “Good Hearted Woman” played in F before. If you tried it, you’d know what I mean.
That reminds me of a story. Years back, you may recall my mention of that bar in Montana where I heard a half-blind and half-deaf native Indian play every song on the hit parade with three chords. Even “Proud Mary” that has 12 or 13 chords. While the rest of the bar roared in laughter at the guy, Bill and I sat there in total appreciation of what he was doing. I sort of admit that I had to laugh out loud a few times myself, but you get my point.
I am the opposite of the fake book style. I believe every tune has an essence, a “spirit” that the talented musician can and should try to capture. You know when it happens, we’ve all seen a small band or soloist do a stunning rendition and we’ve also heard the opposite when somebody strums through. That is the difference between JJ and I, how I intensely study and analyze a tune to get it right. (Note I do this only for what I play, not what I listen to for my own relaxation. But still.)
Rather than play 500 songs in the “ticky-bop” fashion, I’m inclined to pick around 40 tunes and play them as accurately as possible. Atypically, it turns out JJ does not even have any method to listen to originals. That’s right, he does not even own a “record player or a tape deck”. Whereas I search, download, file, clip, transcribe, convert and burn the lyrics and chords to disk for him, JJ takes the disk and sets it on the counter. Doesn’t know how to operate it. (His son has a computer but no printer, read Internet toy.)
So no matter what I do with my famous country boogie or southern fried rock bass, everything comes out like ersatz Karaoke. And JJ has two speeds, too fast and too slow. He plays “Good Lookin” and something like 160 beats per minute, way out of dancing or singing range and leaving no chance for my bass runs. Nonetheless, this is what I have to work with and so it goes. Any band is better than no band, even one that lacks color and dynamics. Plus, there is always a chance it will lead somewhere.
Otherwise, things are as expected. Musicians are not always the most technical or cerebral crowd. When I mention a my aversion to playing slow music (the concept), JJ often takes this to mean I did not like a given specific tune. Not so, there are dozens of slow pieces I like, but I find them unsuitable for stage work. You don't play opera to a drinking crowd and you don't play too much old Neil Young, either. JJ figures that limits my repertoire, I figure it gets rid of tunes that don’t provide the greatest good to the greatest number. Anyone who recognizes this as the Fallacy of Composition is right, but the difference is I totally understand the small picture view. And it is wrong. Ne’er the twain shall meet. So, let’s see how it progresses and we’ll come back to the same topic after a few gigs. Here’s some trivia.
A study in Buffalo (New York, not New Jersey) says women who want to be “romantically desirable” are less likely to take math or science courses. Well, gee, if it is genetically programmed, why that lets them of the hook. And all along we’ve been blaming such women for their immature fairy tale fantasies. What I can’t figure out is why men who want to be desirable do the same thing, never growing out of the tough guy stage and joining gangs. But what do I know? C’mon now, answer that fair and square.
[Author's note: I know it's tempting to think of the woman who did that study or other similar studies as an unattractive apologist, but this one may be okay. This may be her picture. Lora Parks, no relation to Mao Tse Parks. Very doable, at least when she's all dolled up like shown here. Love you long time.]
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