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Yesteryear

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

July 3, 2013

           Chronological order today, this is the order in which things happened or were thought of. A recent statistic shows at any given time, every American is unwittingly committing three felonies. Still, it is a better legal system than Canada, where they retroactively change the law if they can’t get you any other way. So when I refer to that obscure ruling that every trailer court is required to have one smart ass, I’m just obeying the law. If you buy that, you’ll buy anything.
           What I’m referring to is a little flowery weed that started growing in the pavement crack in front of my driveway. I put a little ring of white stones around it, and watched it grow into a foot high bush. Then along came the trailer court and chopped it up and plowed it under. So this morning I placed a little cross at the burial site. See it? Hey, don’t point fingers at me. Another subsection of the same law says every trailer court must have a sexpot divorcee who waters her petunias while wearing fluorescent pink hot pants. They don’t have that here, so they started the ball rolling.
           Zetia, my new expensive prescription, has at least one bad side effect. It shortens one’s temper by keeping you slightly on edge. At first I just felt impatient with everything, but that isn’t unusual. Then I forgot to take the pill for one day. There you go. JZ just called, I’m giving him the cable box converter for his massive dinosaur TV.
           He can’t believe I never watch TV yet he of all people should know that. In return, I cannot believe he doesn’t drink coffee. When he does, he drinks it black. We are going to try to get some structural work done on this place as it looks like I’ll be here another year anyway. We are planning to put a new air conditioner in the Florida room, for example.
           After beginning to read Crichton’s “Micro”, I’ve decided to make a daily conscious effort to reduce my carbon footprint. He makes the point that despite environmental education bordering on indoctrination, most schoolchildren cannot “identify common plants and insects found in nature.” Of that, I am guilty and have no excuses. I know only the most obvious plants, some flowers, and a few insects including the mosquito. We’ll likely talk more of this.
           From y’day, I must tell that I do not know all the answers to 3D printing. The purpose of this blog is to get enough information to go looking on your own. The price on high-end units is a carefully guarded secret, another delinquent tactic of Generation Z. They won’t tell you the price until they’ve invaded your privacy. (I asked for a quote from MCAD who wanted to know first what I intended to print.) My interest in the printers is to bypass the years it would take me to learn to build things out of any other materials.
           And money, of course, the money to be made, that attracts me. There are enough single-owner million-dollar businesses out there to prove one person alone can do it alone. This has advantages I cannot begin to dream of. A business where only one person knows the details. No employees, no partners, nobody to steal, rat, argue, or compete. Nobody on the outside or inside, it is too much to imagine. Your perfect stealth business. Hey, you budding scriptwriters, there’s a concept for you.
           During the hot stretch of the afternoon, I wrote two more reviews. One on the hotel, saying it was an authentic Hawaii experience right down to the roaches, floor mold, and glacial elevators. I even gave it two stars because it is better than Motel 6, who I gave one star. And a review on the Goodwill bookstore, clearly stating that if you read only escape literature and have utterly no cerebral or academic brain activity, Goodwill can help you. My reviews are heralded as accurate because they are.
           Oops, the Ruskies have blown up another launch. There is so much more to getting it right than copying the other guy, as my own brother can confirm. Isn’t that the tenth fail since I started counting? That’s what happens, Ivan, when you recycle old ballistic components into new Protons. What? Cancel that last sentence. I’m not supposed to know about that.
           What’s this, the cable companies are complaining that people are opting out for free broadcast TV? Gee, after years of rate increases, substandard programming, and 32 commercials per hour, who’d have thunk that could happen? Not to mention their monopolistic attitudes and how it took a federal injunction to make them stop cranking the volume during commercials.
           For those who read this far, here is the real top item of the day. Here is the commercial version of NeverWet, the product that hates water. There is enough here to treat 15 square feet, although we don’t know what yet to test. Did I say test?
           Yes, nowhere in the advertising does it talk about what we need to know. For example, how long does the coating last on different surfaces? It is, after all, applied like paint. If you treat gloves, do they become slippery? Is there an antidote? There are no shortage of valid questions around here.
           In this picture, the NeverWet is part of a still life picture at the local pub. This is what a thinking man is likely to place on the counter, and in a moment I’ll tell you a tale from the trailer court. A friend of mine bartends on Wednesdays and I needed to borrow a 9/32” drill bit. Of course, we talked about the NeverWet and how one of the first treatments will be the lining of my motorcycle helmet. So it doesn’t get wet in the rain.
           But, not everyone has the right attitude toward progress. One of the nearby patrons, a guy we all know, blurts out that it must be nice to have nothing but free time, implying I had nothing else to do. Well! Let me explain something for the umpteenth time. I worked hard to be able to pursue my big ideas and useless dreams. I was born the poorest of the poor and the fact that I never made millionaire does not detract from the fact I got the hell out of that poverty cycle on my own. I can do as I please AND most importantly that is no thanks to not even one other person in this world. Those who owe favors are known for their lack of achievements.
           I’m a thousand times ahead of where I started and I’m glad that bothers people who have made no such accomplishment—they gave up, I didn’t. I am doing things now that require years of idle time and I’m proud of it. If I had been born rich, I’d have been discovering and learning things my whole life, and to blazes with what others think. Others play darts for a hobby, my, how intellectual. My creative life began the day I no longer had to rely on anybody.
           As it was, I had to waste the first half of my life working to stay alive. Be damned if I’ll waste the second half to keep the losers of the world at bay. I had received my life’s quota of jealousy, envy, and backstabbing criticism by the time I was ten, thank you.
           In the upcoming days, we will talk more about NeverWet. To the vexation of my detractors, I will make sure of it. Damn sure.