July 17, 2015

Yesteryear
One year ago today: July 17, 2014, don’t buy Vivitar.
Five years ago today: July 17, 2010, $27,500 per pound.
Six years ago today: July 17, 2009, my last really fun performance.

MORNING
           Inflation. Here is your pound of butter now pushing $6.00. And Land’o’Lakes isn’t exactly your gourmet brand. Many others have taken to selling it by the half-pound with a facing that looks the same size from the aisle. For your information, when I moved to Florida in late 1999, butter was 92 cents a pound.

           I put in an offer on the house and went for coffee. It’s Friday and there are no women in this town who want to go to the movies. I know, because I asked them. That’s a joke, son. But I would be surprised indeed to find one who really went to movies instead of just claim she does in her dating profile. I even read the morning paper. A man was arrested for “resisting arrest without violence”. Does that mean he did not actively assist them by putting the cuffs on by himself?
           Agt. M called, after being out of the loop for nearly ten days. He’s found an electric bike for half price, alas I had to tell him he’s got terrible timing. I may soon need every penny I can cobble together. The bank has said they would consider my offer (the house is bank-owned, contrary to the advertisement). But they want to see proof of funds, which I have learned not to do for more than $10,000.
           However, the goal was to get the bank to listen, and they did. The cooling vents in the house have been eaten by rodents. That’s not a big fix job for JZ and I. But there was mention of termite damage. That is always a question of degree, since most houses in Florida have termite damage. This means an inspection trip, which means the soonest is about a week from now. Hmmm, a Friday. Make a weekend of it, maybe?

NOON
           It looks like rain so the club met up at the Panera. Everyone needs plenty of notice if this house goes through and I would probably sent Agt. M up there for a month. I’ve calculated that the worst that could happen on this place is I would lose $10,000. So if I live there two years, I’ll get that back. We also discussed the monster bike, which has dropped to low priority. It was beginning to resemble and electric dirt bike, and such things are readily available these days. Here is a picture of a kid’s dirt bike frame he showed me. For only $1600. A third of what we can build it for.

           Also revealed in this picture is more inflation. You can see my trademark scribbler on the left, and above it a bowl of clam chowder. That is not $5.19 plus tax—for a bowl of soup. To bread chunks, no butter, is another 75¢. Add the two drinks, that’s my coffee and his iced tea, and that’s $11 just for what you see here. That's QE (quantitative easing) for you. The government printing up $85 billion a month for a year and paying their bills with it. Yep, time to get into a house with a real kitchen and operate out of there. But first, I want to know about that weird architecture.
Further research at the library brings up no information on this “cooling duct” system used older Florida houses. It may be that            I’ll have to actually climb the roof and take a look for myself. But my thinking is if there ever was a duct, the channel will still be there and the usual reason such things don’t get repaired is not the cost, but the amount of work involved.
For that matter, I have only ever seen two houses with this style of roof, and they are about a half a block apart. I’m of a mind to just knock on their door and ask about this ducting system. I learned a long time ago if I put on a tie and carry a clipboard, people will let me get away with just about anything.
           I took mid-day off and went to the foreign cinema to watch “Gueros”. Don’t bother, it is billed as a comedy but is a low-budget art film with the slums of Mexico City for a backdrop. It concerns a delinquent who is sent to live with his brother, a grad student who steals electricity. The campus is shut down by students protesting the charging of tuition, which is dumb, since Mexico has no middle class. Like, so why anybody who can afford to go to university be worried about tuition.
           It’s a dumb movie, not even worth the TV version. Weak plot, they chase around trying to find some old guy to autograph a tape. When they find him, he tells them to eff off and falls asleep. Filmed somewhere between black and white and sepia.

NIGHT
           We convened the meeting from the Panera back to the clubhouse, where I detailed my requirements for a portable computer system, as opposed to a laptop or and iPad, or any of the new hybrids. Those are the latest batch of tablets that have a keyboard. My needs are simple, but these “Android” style gadgets are inherently complicated unless your objective is to be entertained like an idiot. For example, the ones I liked lacked a word processor, and you know how I feel about downloading anything that is supposed to be there in the first place.

           That stereotypes Millennials for me, the very fact that they can even sell a computer device that can’t word process. To me, that is an essential. I first worked a word processor back in 1981 and loved it instantly. It would be years before I trusted them, but I glommed onto them in a wink. Did you know the early models used to make a beep at the 75th line character, like the carriage return bell on a typewriter?
           My ideal is a tablet or pad like the one shown here, with the requirement that it is fast and easy to load and display pictures. Even this Win 8.1 Acer I’m using is not convenient for that, the procedure is four separate steps. The unit tested has an Android interface only, and you can see the icons are a little blurry at the greatest enlargement.
           My becoming aware of technology can easily predate my purchase of it by years, especially when I don’t trust it. And not being backward compatible is a very good reason not to trust. Other reasons are lack of security, which to me is inherent in Bluetooth because it is wireless. Hence, I did not know if all devices were compatible, or if constant Adobe-like updates were required. I want a pad that accepts a generic USB keyboard. After several hours of looking, we could not find what I wanted.
           But some of the models appear to be good compromises. All I need is that word processor, a camera, a movie player, and of course my music. All of these products seem to be fragile, all are plastic, none are weather proof, none have good quality cases, which in my view would mean real leather. Some lack SD card slots, some with the slot won’t play back movies on a stick even at the largest buffer setting and a two minute wait.

ADDENDUM

           Here’s the picture missing from y’day. Since I can’t animate this blog (and they wonder why people don’t read them as often), you’ll have to imagine the panels appearing one by one. This is a photo I downloaded and split into three, that was my part of the creation. The top panel is clipped, but the voice bubble reads, “It says here that one in four guitar players is gay.”
           Back to the mystery cool air ducting system. The real estate agent has no clue, either. By later in the day, the bank has indicated they will consider our offer, which is less than half of the listing price. JZ did detect an air circulation problem, which he called “old people smell”. I sensed nothing. But he does have a talent for identifying such things.
           According to the bank, the ductwork that kept the house cool, or at least cooler, in the summertime has been gnawed away over the years. I’ve heard of that with early building materials containing natural glues are prone to this type of attack. I once live in a college dorm where insects ate the binding of my dictionary. Nonetheless, we are fine with a fixer upper as long as it can be lived in meanwhile and the structure is sound.
           Under a magnifying lense, I noticed openings into the attic that looked like some form of cooling system. But I know nothing about how people kept cool in Florida in the days before air conditioning. I always thought the best way to get out of the Florida heat was to get out of Florida period.


Last Laugh

(Ethnic humor is as equally permitted here as all other types.
This blog is not intended for the ignorant or self-sensitive.)
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