One year ago today: March 14, 2017, on mollycoddling.
Five years ago today: March 14, 2013, DeeDee – gone & forgotten.
Nine years ago today: March 14, 2009, frog’s legs.
Random years ago today: March 14, 2014, NYCTA, NQA.
That new multi-tool became a favorite in one day. Much more functional for me than the collapsing pliers style. That’s me repairing the jack on my favorite bass and unclogging my glue bottle. I was working in the shed and tried my hand at making a few miter cuts. The radial arm saw I have is overkill but it was the best item with miters I’ve ever built so far. Just some scrap lumber made into a tray to keep all my “used once” screws and not-too-bent nails. Everybody should have one of those.
And while you are at it, does your house have a Faraday cage? Some people, such as my recently fired cardiologist, do not understand the world has changed. Blind trust in the system, no matter how good it has been to you or how lucky you’ve are, is misplaced. The government has become the aggressor, which makes things like privacy a personal responsibility. The people that run this country still have a lot of growing up to do. And Trump is helping some of them along by freeing them to find work more in line with their mental capabilities.
A Faraday cage is just an enclosed space that does not allow electronic transmissions in or out. These days, electronic snooping can practically x-ray your house and it is wise to remember that every item that the authorities can turn on their own citizens has been used in this manner. This is not conjecture or conspiracy theory. Equipment designed to catch criminals is consistently turned on the population at large. When the people upstairs don’t trust anybody, they rarely blame themselves. So, make a cage, it is better to have one before you need one. Cell phones do not work inside a Faraday cage.
My estimate of his cost to repair is $35,000. Why? Because he is zoned light industrial and you cannot replace rafters in that part of town. You have to use trusses, and you are not allowed to build them yourself. So he’s got some factory custom designing them. I hope the guy had insurance, but it’s been so long now I wonder. If I recall, the place was sold of around that same amount of money.
Stanley Park, Vancouver.
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This Wednesday afternoon, was too much for me. I should have been at home doing a siesta session. Dream on, I was over in Winter Haven trying to get work done. Top of the list was a visit to my insurance agent, who said my perfect driving record meant a discount. And it was. All $6 of it. This means, after entertainment, my biggest budget item has become auto insurance. There is an industry that needs to be thoroughly shaken down, but it never will be because it is owned by such a powerful and sinister organization. Meanwhile, you get a couple of late posts, but my experienced readers know that is a damn good alert that something major is going on. This time, it is not a surprise trip, but about music.
First, the scooter. The problem with the brakes was worn out calipers. I suspected as much, so that means $200 in repairs getting plowed into a machine that probably isn’t worth that much. But the savings in gasoline are immediate and enough to offset part of that massive bribe, oops, I meant payment, to the insurance companies to be allowed to drive my car. Here is the place the scooter is being worked on. I only take my vehicles to the classiest of junk yards.
Next, the part you want to hear. The band rehearsal. It went okay, another set of tunes up to speed but not up to par. I’m going to have to accept at least a temporary drop in quality, but I know how to fix that. Get on stage. Nothing works better, even on people who have no stage fright. It’s the final incentive and it screams, “Get ready or get lost.” Lady Nik has zero fright of making mistakes, and that is such a huge advantage that I can’t even say.
We have 22 songs nearly ready, paying attention to the adjective. She seems to have largely beaten the jinx that was causing her to lapse into comping. She does play each tune differently now, but not as differently as hoped for. Again, stage time to the rescue. Shown here is a screen shot of an activity I would rather never happen (at my age): I’m teaching a guitar player where to fret a chord, finger by finger. For as many times I’ve sworn I would never again stoop to that level, I remain convinced that my decision to keep this lady on was correct. Just give me 80 to 100 hours stage time with her to prove it.
Isn’t it neat how my self-confidence exudes even in my writing? Ha. It’s like the RCMP motto: “Often wrong, but never in doubt.”
Others do not and likely cannot come close to the versatility of our arrangements—this was planned in from the get-go. We regularly drift into playing wildly un-country like rock tunes as a joke—and don’t make the obvious suggestion just because you may not like country music. Another rock band in Polk County is a shortcut to oblivion and a sure way to lose money.
And money we can use, let me tell you. My coffers have been drained by said increases in insurance, vehicle repair, gasoline, and electrical rough-in costs. (The band had a budget so no problems there.) Every account is dangerously low, it would take me 20 days to react if anything went wrong at this point. However, anyone who leads a dynamic life knows this situation is unavoidable no matter how you dance. Don’t worry about me, I said the funds were low, I never stated the amounts in reserve but I will tell you I have learned to never count on anyone else. Would you doubly verify that for us, Theresa? Wallace?
This band will make money if we get out there. On that count, I’ve booked us for five consecutive Sundays at a small inn with a pub near Shipp Lake, over in Winter Haven. Beginning the week before Palm Sunday, and that holiday itself, we play their new but currently empty patio out back. The front of the establishment is unimpressive, a severely dated and impossible to improve 1950-ish configuration. You walk through the lobby, which has two pool tables (hey, this is Florida) and step through the back door. It’s a brand new 40x40 foot deck, with a huge tent covering and retractable awnings. I want one.
The deck is, like I said, brand new. Seating is for up to probably 35 people in some comfort and a small dance floor. Abundant electrical outlets and a decorative fireplace complete the atmosphere. It is enough to impressively offset the otherwise blasé architecture. No stage, it is primarily a good-weather pub dining area. Except for the cold spells which never last, this is the time of year to be outside in Florida. The place is a mile from downtown at a semi-major crossroads. I do believe that unlike other bands around here, we are good enough to draw a following, but in case not, read on. This is important, because the drunk driving laws have long since made following bands a risky after-sunset adventure.
Another trick of the trade, and I know this trade, is I will often independently advertise. I’m careful to advertise the band, not the establishment. Don’t want any objections from that angle, you understand. Just a strategic and well-negotiated low priced ad or two. If even a couple of strangers are drawn in by the pitch, this transplants into management brain cells that the band has a following. Get it? Thank you, thank you, why yes, it IS a brilliant tactic now that you mention it: the pseudo-following.
But I’ve already told you too much. I dislike copycat competition, not that any of my loyal readers would ever do such a nasty thing. I trust them like I would trust my own brother. What? That’s right, he did, didn’t he? Yes, I still have the scar between my shoulder blades. Thanks for reminding me before I wrote anything embarrassing.
[Author’s note: my above mention of low cash levels reminds me of a lady I almost took up with. The stats say you are not supposed to pay more than (it varies) 30% of your take-home income on your house. But this lady spent almost all her pay on the interior of her condo. She had never been to Hawaii, never been to an art show, and rode the bus to work. However, you should have seen the interior. Gulp! She got her value back out of it by spending all her time indoors. Everything was top quality, the walls were custom-panel wainscotting, the doors had decoration frames imported from Norway, the kitchen and bathroom were real marble, quarried to specification.
Yet it was a condo so it would all eventually amount to nothing. The next owner would likely paint over the door frames because they are bare wood to him. This is a case where a dwelling was someone’s only diversion and only source of pride, so 80% of income was natural fto her. I took her out to a super downtown French café for scrumptious meat pies before I found out she had no concept of dining out; I could have taken her to Burger King. Sigh, and my more keen-minded readers know that if I took her out to dinner, it was after the goods had been delivered. In this instance, antique goods that didn’t feng shui with anything else in my place.]
ADDENDUM
The hot dog prospectus. I ran some numbers and they do not look bad. The sausage meat, I can’t say the same. All beef hot-dogs seem to have disappeared. All I found were various brands of mixed chicken and pork, all heavily seasoned, probably to disguise the taste. I looked at various options, one of them was this Polish sausage I saw at the Dade County Fair. It was sold as a gourmet hotdog on a Kaiser bun for $9. There are fourteen to a package, so the meat is 32.071 cents per link. Carrying to the third decimal point of a cent is a rule of thumb that a cost manager is looking around. See, you are smarter already. The cheapest “weiner” hot dogs were 7.416 cents per link, and the minimum bun that didn’t look like styrofoam that had been sat on had a unit price of 12.375 cents. That means the bread costs more than the meat.
Last product checked was the cheapest packs of potato and corn chip industrial byproduct. Wow, those little bags cost 31.218 cents each even when bought in cartons of 32. Things have changed since my day when the meat was always the most expensive component of every meal. Have non-meat prices soared, or has the quality of meat declined enough that they can sell it so cheap? Could even be government subsidies. But do the math. Presume the relish and stuff costs 3 cents per unit, that would make the variable cost of a hotdog on a bun 22.791 cents. The bag of chips to go with it costs more.
These are preliminary studies. Of course, I would shop around for better quality and look into bulk pricing. I read six testimonials on-line and they don’t ring true, at least the part about telling the whole cost. This leads me to postulate many of the vendors don’t carefully control costs or stockpile when prices are low. I’m the other extreme, I would have a freezer and back up generator in operation even for a single cart. I would be constantly monitoring prices and calculating EOQs (economic order quantities), since I see in general, hot dogs are still sold by the dozen while buns are sold eight to a package.
It’s speculation only right now. I’ve heard some Fairs charge 50% of sales and watch you like a hawk. I would need a profit split that made it difficult as hell for a partner to strike out on his own and a backup plan in the event. That would not be as tricky as it seems, since everybody I know spends their money as fast as they can. I would naturally keep as much of the management operation as possible under wraps, no need to teach anyone my trade secrets. I’ve heard the story around town about some lady who says she made $1,400 one day downtown at the monthly antique auto show. I never take such things at face value.
Was that her gross or net? If it was gross, that is a few hundred hot dogs. If that is net, then she would not have had time to sell that many. I’ve been at the show. Salespeople always tend to report their best day as if it were normal. But did her income and expense cycles coincide? I mean, she could have been selling surplus stock from the day before, or had not paid the current bills yet. Heck, everybody is rich on payday. This is why I tend to look at the hot dogs as a scientific experiment in business financing.
Do these other operators even know how to calculate the optimum cash balance? Are they putting money away for depreciation, and annual fees? Is there a direction to their venture or are they flying seat-of-the-pants? If what I’ve seen of Florida rings true, all but the most hard-nosed owners have no concept of management beyond the upcoming month’s festivities. At the other end of the field, I’m the past master when it comes to effective money management. Tomorrow, given time before or after music rehearsal, I’ll prepare some more spreadsheets to extrapolate sales.
For example, and this may not be a practical example, according to the above, my variable cost of direct materials for 500 hot dogs would be less than $125, and if I sold them all for $3, $3.50, or $4.00 (the cheapest I’ve seen), the respective gross would be $1,500, then $1,750, then $2,000. That creates a figure called, what was it, “net operating income before fixed expenses”. See, I forget, but why do I have the feeling I’m going to be motivated to relearn all these key terms in a fast hurry. As for a breakaway upstart of a trained employee, ha, from what I’ve seen, I could undercut the guy and drive him out of business for a couple hundred bucks out of petty cash. But that would be vindictive.
Last Laugh
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