Of all the. Guess who came down with appendicitis and is out of action for the next two weeks? The awesome Arnel. He’s got all three major paying gigs at the beach tied up on the weekends, Toucan’s, the Riptide and the Walkabout. Prime time, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays. I told you he was Numero Uno, and sharing those gigs is the exact slice of pie I am missing out on. I’m auditioning other guitarists as soon as possible. Meanwhile, Arnel is out a lot of hard cash.The band from Boynton Beach is seriously trying to recruit me. It is not a duo and it is so far away. Their song list is nearly identical to mine and they have been around for a long time, playing from the Keys to Tampa. I really have to think this one through, they have some powerful enticements to offer. Take their song list, for example. I do not scout other country bands, I play what the audience wants. Then along comes a professional show band with a completely different history and almost same song list. Which proves again that the rest of the army is marching wrong.
Author's note: in the end, I did not join this band because it is too long a commute. Even under ideal conditions, it is a 45 minute drive each way. And ideal does not exist in Florida, where once they tear up a stretch of road, it stays torn up. Big time.
They also have some correct procedures, including playing the tune in the original key or not playing it at all. If you are going to play covers, there are rules that some people never grasp, and that is one of them. Another is to play the original hit unless something prevents it, none of this Zydeco ka-hooey. They have stated their rehearsals amount to tightening up the intros and outros. You are expected to show up knowing the body of the tune. There are many such tell-tale signs of encouragement.
This is definitely in contrast to people I’ve tried to work with in this town. The locals who sing and play seem to think that actually gives them two votes. You spend months learning their crappy song list without any guaranty they will rehearse a given tune at the next practice or play that tune at the next gig. That situation means no incentive to knuckle down and create a catchy bass line (the way I traditionally do with each tune I play). On top of that, they’ll make some snarky comment that you “could be a decent bass player” if you really tried. Tried what? To become a mind-reader?
Locals don’t like fixed set lists either, for it takes away from the illusion they are calling the stage shots and you are the lowly camp follower. Any tune you want to play, forget it. They’ll invent an excuse, my favorite being that it “isn’t right” for their voice, or they’ll suggest you sing it. (Like, if you could sing it you’d be putting up with their bullsh in the first place.)
The last time one of my ex-guitarists phoned to re-form our duo, I thought he had learned his lesson about my abilities (he had convinced himself I had no musical future without him). Nope, reality sailed between his ears unimpeded in both directions. This, from an individual who can only dream of a house gig. When I began to discuss assurances to prevent a repeat of his musical dictatorship, he hung up. That’s the same dodo who kicks others off stage whenever he decides to solo. No wonder he is perpetually playing coffee houses that work out to less than minimum wage. My expenses have now dropped to 10.7%. On an hourly basis, I handily make many times the money he does. Yep, completely, utterly unimpeded.
Granted, you say, but what about the exciting news from the shoe shop? Your patience is now rewarded. Grasshopper. We are finally beginning to see shoes from the new China. They are held together mainly by glue, even the stitching is fake. Mind you, it is real leather, still by far the best material for footwear and likely to stay that way. And that glue is something else. It can become real employment when something needs to be removed. The downside is the non-leather parts, such as the insoles, tend to be made of a paper-like material. Until you own a shop, you have no idea how bothersome walk-in sales people can be. When you point to the “no soliciting” sign, they do what I would do. Say, “I thought that meant everybody else but me.”
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