A quiet mid-August Friday in 2013, a day that will pass, for most, like any other day. Not here, I mean, because just writing it down makes it infinitely more memorable. So let’s recap the day and see what, if anything, made the list. Let me first say that I put in a full 7-1/2 hour day, the first in something like seven years. For now we will overlook the fact that it took me almost 11 hours to do it. But I did it non-stop in the sense of only stopping for refreshments, no siesta, and when I took a break, I just leaned back from the work. At the end, I was not tired. That means an awful lot to me.
The work was those bumpers. The reason I wear all the safety gear is not because I’m a pro, but because I have very little idea what I am doing. Here is my saw and it mystifies me because, if you know your saw teeth, this is not a crosscut or combination blade. Yet this rusty old saw cuts so well I’ll keep it forever if I can. I’ve tried everything to restore this blade to new and shiny, including rubbing it down with a sharpening stone, to no avail.
It is because I’m an amateur that I’m proceeding cautiously. I’ve never built a trailer before. I have two sticks measured to length and if they won’t fit inside, I stop work and correct the error. The interior dimensions cannot be allowed to change as I intend to sleep (as opposed to live) inside this crate 80% of my future road time. And I have no experience at that either, so that is only a projection guiding my planning stage. I’ve chosen to rig up a fake frame from el cheapo furring strips to test my theories. Remind me to get you a photo of that when it happens.
I’m on budget so I wasn’t pleased to learn that wood preservative is $15 a pint. Plus tax. It transpires that my immediate circle of friends here know nothing about the treatment of exterior wood, which surprises me because they are all home owners. I remember back in Texas seeing this guy treat his fence posts with a mixture of Twenty-Mule Team Borax, mixing it with anti-freeze and a half cup of diesel fuel. That’s probably illegal today but his hog fence was still there last year. This is not an option nowadays because it turns the wood into something really nasty.
No, I will not use linseed oil. That stuff never dries properly and always emits fumes. If you want to sleep in something soaked with that on it, go ahead. Other things I rule out for similar reasons are turpentine and paint primers that contain ketone. These are also paint solvents and I intend to paint the wood. So I don’t want anything that would interfere with that. But right now I’m in a situation where I am not going to put $15 worth of preservative on $3 worth of lumber.
Here is my invaluable heavy duty metalworking tool. You can see I was testing it to see how well a coat of Rustoleum™ worked and in several years it seems to have made no real difference. So the spike is recycled as a handy way of bending small pieces and it works quite well for prying out pins and bolts when I make all kinds of mistakes.
Clamps. You know, ordinary u-shaped clamps like for holding glued parts for drying. They are christly expensive. They always were so I got into the habit of using zap straps (plastic cable ties) for all my needs. But ties are only adequate for lightly glued parts and things that don’t have to line up nicely. I’ll check the budget and see if I can’t get a couple of nice ones for ten or fifteen bucks. That’s all for today about the camper but you can tell I had a fun working again. I would give anything to go back to work for a few years.
On the return leg from Homer Depot I stopped at Karaoke. This isn’t going out on Friday because it is right along the way. Debbie, the hostess, cured a feedback problem that I didn’t know she had, but as a reward for you reading this far, I’ll tell you how she found this elusive and specialized problem. Windows 7 and beyond are as equally pieces of shit as any other MicroSoft operating systems and they cannot be tweaked in one area without spoiling another. Windows 7 has a feature for recording that is on by default.
This means when you have a laptop with a built in microphone, that little sucker can pick up your speakers if they are nearby your Karaoke stand. And they usually are. Watch for that. Go in and turn off the recorder in whatever Windows now calls the control panel. Sneaky, that was, but she found it. However, that is not what we were visiting over. I truly dislike the way Karaoke suppliers used CDs and the way DJs had to lug cases of 200 disks at a time, flipping through them to find the next tune when they should be mingling or working the room. We are looking at consolidating her disks onto something more user-friendly.
My motive is that I’m still kicking myself for now buying out that guy who was trying to sell 80,000 top hits for $150 in 2008. But I didn’t have the cash so that year practically disappeared on me. But remember Wanda’s gear? If so, you’ll remember how I said that stuff would sit and gather dust. That’s even sadder when you consider it was already severely outdated material. I’m looking at that as well.
This is the beginning of the third week of my diet. It isn’t true their claim that you save money because quality vegetables and fruit can cost more per pound than the foregone meat and other proteins. And you go through more pounds of it when veggies are the main course. What I used to eat in a week (very roughly) I now take in one day—but that’s a loaded statement since I’ve never been a big fan of veggies. They call them sides, you know.
I don’t miss dairy products at all which I thought I would crave. I’ve become a great consumer of artificial flavorings. Now that I’m consuming up to six cups of hot tea per day, it is one of the zero-calorie drinks I boost with tantalizing orange, pineapple, rum, and maple. But don’t read me wrong, this is a recent thing and I fully recognize these are chemicals. (For a frustrating time, try to find a list of all the artificial flavors commonly available.) I will find a source of natural extracts if I continue to like my tea this way when this diet is over.
And last day I said I could not find licorice flavoring. Well, today I ran across this web site, Northwest Extract which appears to say they can duplicate any flavor, including the missing [from your store shelf] diary products, and if I’m reading them right, they can produce beer flavor and fresh bread flavor as additives.
Does anyone remember that Elvis kicked the bucket today in 1977? Or care?
ADDENDUM
Actually, it is almost impossible to find a listing of all the artificial flavors mentioned above. So here is a string of NATURAL extracts you might like: Almond, Amaretto, Apple, Apricot, Banana, Black Walnut, Blackberry, Blueberry, Brandy, Brown Sugar, Butter, Butter Pecan, Butterscotch, Caramel, Cassis, Cherry, Chocolate, Cinnamon, Coconut, Coffee, Creme de Menthe, Grand Marnier, Hazelnut, Honey, Key Lime, Lemon, Lime, Macadamia, Maple, Marshmallow, Orange, Peach, Pear, Peppermint, Pineapple, Pistachio, Pomegranate, Praline, Raspberry, Root Beer, Rum, Sour Cream, Strawberry, Tangerine, Toffee, White Chocolate, Wintergreen.
I left out a few, like the obvious vanilla, and some spice flavorings like pumpkin pie and nutmeg since these are already zero-calorie items. Cassis is a type of black currant. You want to hear about a coincidence? There is one primary supplier of these natural flavorings anywhere near Florida. And I was probably a mile away a few months ago and did not know it. Savannah, Georgia.
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