June 7, 2019

Yesteryear
One year ago today: June 7, 2018, ici, stats, & lii.
Five years ago today: June 7, 2014, logic gate coincidence.
Nine years ago today: June 7, 2010, yeah, but they’re housewives.
Random years ago today: June 7, 2007, memory lane.

           Here’s how it went last night. Upon finishing the six-pack caddy, it came about that nobody around here had six bottles of beer, er, I mean the correct material a size fit. This meant I had no choice but to take the article for a, um, er . . ., a field test. That’s it. A field test. I did not shirk my duty. After feeding and bedding down the critters, I got myself, my notebook, and the prototype out to Shooters, on Old Hickory Blvd. It was necessary to purchase six bottles to confirm the size of the pockets. Shown here, they are empty because for some strange Tennessee reason, empty bottles cannot be removed from the place of purchase. They likely need the 5¢ deposit, if you ask me.

           As usual, this is conspicuous behavior, particularly since the staff know me and expect I’m not going to sit there watching sports and such. The [bottle] fit was perfect, though it was a good idea to leave the dividers loose. There are two defects, one was expected, the other you are a brainiac if you can figure it out by looking. Shawn, the staff lady, and I killed at least an hour cracking up over this, including the possibility of renting it out by the half-hour. I got a few bites myself, but they were all plain Janes. Yes, I know that any one of them could have a wonderful personality, but I was judging myself, not the women.

           The first problem is the carry handle. It does get in the way when the long-neck bottles are in place. This isn’t an easy fix, since the obvious solution is to weaken the handle by cutting it down in size. But that won’t do, because it would risk your precious cargo. It was about this time Shawn and I realized if there were any design defects, I would have to return tomorrow and do all this over again. So for the next fifteen minutes it was quick, think of some design defects. It was as close as I’ve been to the atmosphere of a millennial digital camera workshop.
           Have you guessed the other flaw? It’s weight. The empty box is hefty and with the bottle present, it may be imperative to switch to a lighter wood. I’m thinking maybe a collapsible handle. It’s a way to correct a problem, which must also be present in the store-bought model I reverse-engineered to get this prototype. Can you imagine what I want. Cut a couple of slots on the end pieces, and the handle would have to be inserted into place before the box was fastened together. You reach between the bottle necks to lift it with a finger, then slip your hand into the slot. This also adds an element of cleverness to the plan, which is always a good selling point.

Picture of the day.
Silk weaving.
Remember to use BACK ARROW to return to blog.

           Another 22 mile drive trying to find a place to put money on my phone. The usual places have been removing their kiosk machines and GPS, well it lies. Sent me to 401 S. Mt. Juliet drive, which is a big empty field and a furniture outlet on the other side of it. Forget trying to find Sprint outlets with GPS, they come and go at several times the rate Garmin can update their databases. This disconnect between provider and user has never worked and using the computer as a wonder-toy only glosses over the problem.
           I’m reminded of the 1977 New York blackout, but on a global scale. I was with the phone company when they made the mistake of hiring “coders”. Each department started to create records databases in isolation. I warned them, but did not offer to help as I had been passed over for promotion in favor of some big-shot’s daughter. Sure enough, years later the trouble came home to roost, and they spent a fortune amalgamating all the systems. The thorniest bit was the address records. I fell out of my chair laughing at how they tried to standardize those. But by then everybody knew I was planning on leaving.

           For the record, east of the Mississippi they have the annoying habit of giving every street several names. West of the Mississippi, they accomplish the same confusion by each town having multiple roads with the same name. A local favorite near Anacortes Island is “River Road”. There’s a reason Lewis & Clark took a year to find their way back.

           GastroZombies. The deterioration of service at Harbor Frieght, and things like not being able to put money on my phone, it all points to my newest theory. It will take time to figure out the details, but I got to thinking what is the common pattern with all the things gone wrong in the past 25 years? Much as each generation hates to be categorized, I see a definite pattern to what’s happening. This is only a theory, but hear me out. Okay, it starts with food allergies, which were so rare they were not even a factor before 1994. But prior to that, a lot of unsafe ingredients found ways into the food chain. A significant danger was always publicly perceived in animal feed, steroids, growth hormones, and antibiotics. I’ve singled out artificial flavors as a key factor in the way people’s mentalities have changed.
           Studies have show that the majority of people under 30 today in America have never tasted natural flavors, and worse yet, have learned to prefer artificial flavors. To them, real food tastes bland. And don’t be fooled by “natural flavors”, since that only means the flavor is made from edible ingredients. Some edible things are plain no good for you. Artificial flavors are made from inedible chemicals, and are know to cause brain tumors, depression, and genetic damage. My theory says that what’s gone wrong with so many people is due to their consumption of synthetic food. Stop now and think about that.

           I’m not the only one who suspects this frankenfood contains chemicals that cause addiction. They definitely suppress the ability of users to taste the food. To me that explains the rise of beer that tastes like blueberries and maple. How about muffin flavors like banana-strawberry-mango. Or the range of simulated flavorings available at Starbucks. There you have it. These human creatures are gastrozombies. They cannot tolerate real food, they are addicted to the chemicals in their ersatz diet, and they have, as a group, stopped the progress America was known for, and in fact, a relapsing into older fads and modes of thinking that never worked in their day. The music is tribal chanting, the clothes are 1960-style, and the peer pressure advocates genocide of their own race. The malady now lasts way past the usual 30-something waking-up period in life.
           Like my heart attack, there is no common link except the food. Look it up yourself, almost every known side-effect of GMO food and artificial flavoring affects the brain and central nervous system. Result? GastroZombies. They want everybody to be assimilated. Even if they have to drown in debt and open the borders to do it.

ADDENDUM

           Here’s an update on the beer caddy. These show the handle in the collapsed and extended positions. This was an empirical design, meaning no blueprints. I went back and forth an estimate 60 times from work bench to back yard to supply table to get things to fit. I estimate I made 65 cuts with the jigsaw and another 18 with the miter saw, but here is your working model. Only this time, it’s not a model, it’s the real deal.
           Last day, remember the kitty box rinsed with bleach. Then the pics of me with my feet in the cold water. Well, didn’t I get fan mail warning me not to put my feet in bleach. So I wrote back saying that the only way I could achieve that off-white moon glow color so popular with the snot-ring women of today. I mean, everybody wants me to be happy, don’t they? I say again, don’t they?

Last Laugh